VALIDATION AND APPRECIATION

Many years ago I was taking a course and in this course I learned one skill that has changed my life and the way I look at all people, places and things in my world.

What was the skill?  THE SKILL OF APPRECIATION

I tend to be a person who sees the negative in life before I can see the positive and I had spent much of my life complaining about everything that I possibly could complain about before I could come up with something that would work for me that I could not find anything to complain about or criticize.

When the instructor came in and proceeded to explain the power there is in appreciation I was floored……. So simple and yet so difficult to see what I appreciate when I have always looked for the opposite in life.

He started out by showing us how we can appreciate what people have to say. What they have done and let them know it.  At that time in my life I ran an organization with 18 employees and I was so busy that I did not have time to let everyone know that I liked what they were doing, so I just said thank you to them as I was running out the door……..

In my life when someone has said thank you to me I have two common responses that come to mind:

  • Thank you for what?
  • What do you want from me now?

As soon as I learned to use the word appreciate my life changed, the life of the people I worked with changed and my world was a much happier place for me to live in.

Through this life changing lesson I learned:

  • Everyone likes to be validated
  • Appreciation happens mostly at the time it is necessary to appreciate.
  • It is very easy to say “I appreciate you”, “I appreciate all that you do”,” I appreciate how you are when you………….. “
  •  When you use it after the time that you appreciated what they have done, it is an easy way to offer validation without the other person being suspicious!

And

  • Most importantly…..It sure is easy to appreciate myself and the skills that I have and give myself silent credit for them…

For example when I say that I appreciate my ability to talk with people and listen to them…..this is simple, however, if I say Thank you for my ability to talk with people and listen to them…..WHO AM I THANKING……I can accept the personal appreciation, however, saying thank you always indicates for me that I am giving thanks for something that is outside of me.

Appreciation allows me to be inside of me and offering this special gift to me from me!

Peace, love, light, blessings and appreciation

“White Eagle”

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